Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Back To Work
Today I went back to work. YIKES! Not sure if I just have to get used to working again - or if I am fighting something. I had my 4 week follow up appointment with the surgeon yesterday after a weekend where I could hardly get out of bed because of being so dizzy and shaky and generally feeling like crap. He is concerned that I have an infection and is doing some cultures and bloodwork and I am waiting to hear about all that stuff. Until then - it was my day to go back to work - so I did. I missed my work peeps - it was good to see them. I'm easing my way back into the heavy duty stuff. I'm so exhausted and still feeling really cruddy - so I guess we'll see what tomorrow brings.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Overweight
I know! I know! I know! I have been neglecting Pamelot again! I have many worthy excuses, I promise. Though, I'm sure you're not really interested in any of them. It's been a crazy few weeks getting things ready and set up for this year's Upward Cheerleading season. The work as Cheer Commissioner is keeping me a bit busy. I am also in a very busy phase of my project at work.
I am now 10 months out from surgery - hard to believe. I am in the phase where I am able to eat more and more foods - my body is adjusting nicely to my new insides - and I am feeling like I have adjusted to "my new normal". It's no longer this new novel thing to have had gastric bypass. I feel like I have finally adjusted and settled in to life with a smaller stomach and less intestines (romantic isn't it?). I don't have to think so hard about what I'm going to eat, or plan ahead so much. This is just my life and I have settled into it. And I like it.
The weight loss has slowed dramatically - as I knew it would. I would like to lose 20-30 more pounds. I feel that when I up my exercise (I have been slowly getting back to exercise since my ear surgery) I will be able to get a better handle on that and make some progress there. The scale still does move, which is encouraging.
I was having an interesting conversation with some co-workers about BMI yesterday. We were talking about what a "normal" BMI is - how most people are not "normal", and how even though I have lost over 100 pounds I would still be considered in the "obese" range. We were playing around with a BMI calculator and seeing what different weight and heights gave us. So I plugged in my latest weight and discovered .... I am finally overweight! I am no longer obese!
Some calculators also put a category of BMI's above 45 as "Super Morbidly Obese". At my heaviest just before surgery my BMI was 47.6, and so I fell into that awful category. As if "obese" isn't bad enough - you add morbidly to it - then super morbidly. UGH! I always hated that! But it was telling me what I didn't want to hear.
Dictionary.com defines the word morbid as:
Unhealthy mental state or attitude - check. I had a bad attitude (some would argue I still do!)
Characteristic of disease - check. High Blood Pressure, Sleep Apnea, sneaking up on Type II Diabetes, hard to breathe, hard to exercise, hard to do just about anything.
Pertaining to diseased parts - check. Not much to explain there - felt like my whole body was diseased.
Gruesome; grisly - check. That is definitely how I felt about myself.
But I spent many years denying and simply avoiding this about myself. If I can actually loose these last pounds I will find myself in a "normal" BMI range. That actually blows my mind a bit.
I am now 10 months out from surgery - hard to believe. I am in the phase where I am able to eat more and more foods - my body is adjusting nicely to my new insides - and I am feeling like I have adjusted to "my new normal". It's no longer this new novel thing to have had gastric bypass. I feel like I have finally adjusted and settled in to life with a smaller stomach and less intestines (romantic isn't it?). I don't have to think so hard about what I'm going to eat, or plan ahead so much. This is just my life and I have settled into it. And I like it.
The weight loss has slowed dramatically - as I knew it would. I would like to lose 20-30 more pounds. I feel that when I up my exercise (I have been slowly getting back to exercise since my ear surgery) I will be able to get a better handle on that and make some progress there. The scale still does move, which is encouraging.
I was having an interesting conversation with some co-workers about BMI yesterday. We were talking about what a "normal" BMI is - how most people are not "normal", and how even though I have lost over 100 pounds I would still be considered in the "obese" range. We were playing around with a BMI calculator and seeing what different weight and heights gave us. So I plugged in my latest weight and discovered .... I am finally overweight! I am no longer obese!
| 18.5 or less | Underweight | ||
| 18.5 to 24.99 | Normal Weight | ||
| 25 to 29.99 | Overweight | ||
| 30 to 34.99 | Obesity (Class 1) | ||
| 35 to 39.99 | Obesity (Class 2) | ||
| 40 or greater | Morbid Obesity |
Some calculators also put a category of BMI's above 45 as "Super Morbidly Obese". At my heaviest just before surgery my BMI was 47.6, and so I fell into that awful category. As if "obese" isn't bad enough - you add morbidly to it - then super morbidly. UGH! I always hated that! But it was telling me what I didn't want to hear.
Dictionary.com defines the word morbid as:
| 1. | suggesting an unhealthy mental state or attitude; unwholesomely gloomy, sensitive, extreme, etc.: a morbid interest in death. |
| 2. | affected by, caused by, causing, or characteristic of disease. |
| 3. | pertaining to diseased parts: morbid anatomy. |
| 4. | gruesome; grisly. |
Unhealthy mental state or attitude - check. I had a bad attitude (some would argue I still do!)
Characteristic of disease - check. High Blood Pressure, Sleep Apnea, sneaking up on Type II Diabetes, hard to breathe, hard to exercise, hard to do just about anything.
Pertaining to diseased parts - check. Not much to explain there - felt like my whole body was diseased.
Gruesome; grisly - check. That is definitely how I felt about myself.
But I spent many years denying and simply avoiding this about myself. If I can actually loose these last pounds I will find myself in a "normal" BMI range. That actually blows my mind a bit.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Oy!
So I went back to work today. It actually went very well. I felt really good this morning other than being kinda tired because I couldn't fall asleep last night. I'm not sure what that was all about - wide awake until just afte 1am. Doesn't bode well for a 5:30 alarm clock.
I did fine at work - didn't get done as much as I wanted to, but I stayed busy. I tried my first protein bullet. It's a 3 ounce drink with a lot of protein in it. The one I tried had 42 grams of protein in it. It was orange flavored. Not fantastic - but OK. Took me 3 hours to drink 3 ounces. I found I liked it very cold. I also had about half of a jello-snack pack for lunch. And sipped on my water and juice throughout the day. That's a day in life of clear liquids for me!
Tomorrow I get to graduate to full liquids! That means milk, protein shakes, smooth low fat yogurt (like vanilla or lemon - not anything with fruit in it), strained creamy soups, and sugar free pudding. I am a bit excited let me tell you. I have found a wonderful website that has been a life saver for me of late. It is www.bariatriceating.com. When I came home from the hospital I started to have a little bit of "buyers remorse" so to speak. I felt like I would never be able to eat anything that I liked or that tasted good ever again! This web site showed me that there were so many things that I could do with what little I could eat right now. There are a bunch of recipes for all the different food phases. For instance - I found a great quick and easy recipe for a potato soup involving chicken broth and Idahoan dehydrated potato flakes and grated parmesan cheese. I am going to make it for dinner tomorrow - I can't wait. The site has great products that you can order - specifically designed for bariatric patients. It also has a fantastic support forum and message board site. There are RN's, licensed nutritionists, and veterans of WLS moderating the boards. One of the boards is devoted totally to recipes! There are some great ideas on how to make your protein shakes taste better, how to get more protein into your every day foods, and is in general a huge encouragement to those who have decided to make this huge life change. Even if you haven't had WLS - it's worth a gander just for the recipes alone. If you're looking for high protein, low fat and low carb recipes - you will be amazed at the yummy stuff you will find at this site.
So in my excitement about going to full liquids tomorrow I decided I would brave the grocery store with my list in hand after work. I think that was the straw that broke the camels back! I was doing good, but as I was pushing the cart and walking around Harris Teeter I got so achy in my belly (still kinda swollen and tender). Going grocery shopping is a new adventure for me. I have to read all the nutritional and ingredient information on everything! It took me what felt like forever to get about 20 items. I want to get sugar free of a lot of things, but I have to look and be sure there is no aspartame in it. A lot of yogurts are sweetened with aspartame or NutraSweet. I need to check the ingredients to be sure - looking for sucralose or Splenda instead. Or something may say "light", but still has sugar in it. I can't have sugar at all yet, so i really need to pay attention. I'm not interested in testing my dumping ground just yet.
So I will be going to bed when the kids do this evening. I am absolutely exhausted. I am looking forward to tomorrow. I get to have Carnation Instant Breakfast for breakfast! And I am packing some yogurt for lunch. Most of all I can't wait to try the potato soup concoction for dinner. I now have to start recording everything I eat, so I also picked up a small notebook to start journaling my eating. I need to keep track of how many grams of protein I take in and start to work towards getting 80 - 100 grams of protein in a day. I also want to keep an eye on calories and carbs. I also need to start paying attention to when I drink and when I eat. I have to stop drinking 30 minutes before I eat, and can't resume drinking until 30 minutes after I eat.
Something else that I see starting to happen is I'm becoming a tad emotional. I've been forwarned about this. Fat cells actually store and hold on to hormones. As the fat cells shrink they release the hormones back into the body. It can be kind of a wild ride with the hormones. I have found myself a couple of times today crying over seemingly simple things. Now if you were to ask D he would say that's not so unusual, but it is a little odd feeling for me. One time I got all verklempt as I was thinking about a comment that someone made to me about how I was taking back control of my life. Yeah, in a way I am. But in a way I feel like I am cleaning up this temple so I can give it back to God. Control - an ongoing theme in my life. I like it - I want it - I have to have it. And yet as a Christian I am to yield - no release! control in my life to my Savior. A big AH HA! moment for me this past summer that I feel led to my decision to pursue WLS was when I realized that I was working exceptionally hard at controlling a lot of things in the lives of the people around me. My husband, my children, my family, my friends. Why am I so concerned about making sure that my son gets his homework done on my terms? Who's homework is it? It's not my homework. If he doesn't get it done it's his problem - not mine. That realization (and the subsequent release of that control back to my son - which actually worked wonders! He does his homework all on his own! Who knew?) led me to see that I wanted to control all of these outside things because I had no control over my own life - specifically in the area of my weight. Being controlling works for me to some extent - I am a Project Manager - I need to control many details of a moving project - I'm pretty good at it. But I couldn't apply those same principles to myself personally. What a disconnect. And now here I am shedding a few tears again. Hormones, gotta love 'em. I guess the point of this hormonal rant is this: May I ever live in submission to my Savior. He is the one who is in control. He deserves a better temple from me.
I did fine at work - didn't get done as much as I wanted to, but I stayed busy. I tried my first protein bullet. It's a 3 ounce drink with a lot of protein in it. The one I tried had 42 grams of protein in it. It was orange flavored. Not fantastic - but OK. Took me 3 hours to drink 3 ounces. I found I liked it very cold. I also had about half of a jello-snack pack for lunch. And sipped on my water and juice throughout the day. That's a day in life of clear liquids for me!
Tomorrow I get to graduate to full liquids! That means milk, protein shakes, smooth low fat yogurt (like vanilla or lemon - not anything with fruit in it), strained creamy soups, and sugar free pudding. I am a bit excited let me tell you. I have found a wonderful website that has been a life saver for me of late. It is www.bariatriceating.com. When I came home from the hospital I started to have a little bit of "buyers remorse" so to speak. I felt like I would never be able to eat anything that I liked or that tasted good ever again! This web site showed me that there were so many things that I could do with what little I could eat right now. There are a bunch of recipes for all the different food phases. For instance - I found a great quick and easy recipe for a potato soup involving chicken broth and Idahoan dehydrated potato flakes and grated parmesan cheese. I am going to make it for dinner tomorrow - I can't wait. The site has great products that you can order - specifically designed for bariatric patients. It also has a fantastic support forum and message board site. There are RN's, licensed nutritionists, and veterans of WLS moderating the boards. One of the boards is devoted totally to recipes! There are some great ideas on how to make your protein shakes taste better, how to get more protein into your every day foods, and is in general a huge encouragement to those who have decided to make this huge life change. Even if you haven't had WLS - it's worth a gander just for the recipes alone. If you're looking for high protein, low fat and low carb recipes - you will be amazed at the yummy stuff you will find at this site.
So in my excitement about going to full liquids tomorrow I decided I would brave the grocery store with my list in hand after work. I think that was the straw that broke the camels back! I was doing good, but as I was pushing the cart and walking around Harris Teeter I got so achy in my belly (still kinda swollen and tender). Going grocery shopping is a new adventure for me. I have to read all the nutritional and ingredient information on everything! It took me what felt like forever to get about 20 items. I want to get sugar free of a lot of things, but I have to look and be sure there is no aspartame in it. A lot of yogurts are sweetened with aspartame or NutraSweet. I need to check the ingredients to be sure - looking for sucralose or Splenda instead. Or something may say "light", but still has sugar in it. I can't have sugar at all yet, so i really need to pay attention. I'm not interested in testing my dumping ground just yet.
So I will be going to bed when the kids do this evening. I am absolutely exhausted. I am looking forward to tomorrow. I get to have Carnation Instant Breakfast for breakfast! And I am packing some yogurt for lunch. Most of all I can't wait to try the potato soup concoction for dinner. I now have to start recording everything I eat, so I also picked up a small notebook to start journaling my eating. I need to keep track of how many grams of protein I take in and start to work towards getting 80 - 100 grams of protein in a day. I also want to keep an eye on calories and carbs. I also need to start paying attention to when I drink and when I eat. I have to stop drinking 30 minutes before I eat, and can't resume drinking until 30 minutes after I eat.
Something else that I see starting to happen is I'm becoming a tad emotional. I've been forwarned about this. Fat cells actually store and hold on to hormones. As the fat cells shrink they release the hormones back into the body. It can be kind of a wild ride with the hormones. I have found myself a couple of times today crying over seemingly simple things. Now if you were to ask D he would say that's not so unusual, but it is a little odd feeling for me. One time I got all verklempt as I was thinking about a comment that someone made to me about how I was taking back control of my life. Yeah, in a way I am. But in a way I feel like I am cleaning up this temple so I can give it back to God. Control - an ongoing theme in my life. I like it - I want it - I have to have it. And yet as a Christian I am to yield - no release! control in my life to my Savior. A big AH HA! moment for me this past summer that I feel led to my decision to pursue WLS was when I realized that I was working exceptionally hard at controlling a lot of things in the lives of the people around me. My husband, my children, my family, my friends. Why am I so concerned about making sure that my son gets his homework done on my terms? Who's homework is it? It's not my homework. If he doesn't get it done it's his problem - not mine. That realization (and the subsequent release of that control back to my son - which actually worked wonders! He does his homework all on his own! Who knew?) led me to see that I wanted to control all of these outside things because I had no control over my own life - specifically in the area of my weight. Being controlling works for me to some extent - I am a Project Manager - I need to control many details of a moving project - I'm pretty good at it. But I couldn't apply those same principles to myself personally. What a disconnect. And now here I am shedding a few tears again. Hormones, gotta love 'em. I guess the point of this hormonal rant is this: May I ever live in submission to my Savior. He is the one who is in control. He deserves a better temple from me.
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