Bone Scan Results

Dr. Jalkut called me today (yes, on a Saturday) to let me know that the results of my bone scan were "perfect".  That is a huge weight lifted from our shoulders.

So what does this mean?  Well, combined with the fact that my pulmonary CT scan looked clear it means that whatever this mass is - it looks like it has not spread of metastisized.  Dr. Jalkut also said that the abdominal CT scan did not show any enlarged lymph nodes - also a good sign.  Removing the kidney and the mass that has attached itself to it should be the only treatment I need. 

Thank you very much for all your prayers.

Hump Day Blessings

So here are my blessings for today:

1. A neighbor - who I hardly know at this point mind you - friended me on Facebook after hearing of my recent troubles.  She sent me a lovely note and I really appreciated it.  But on top of that - today she dropped by with baked ziti and fresh salad for my family for dinner!  What a huge blessing! And hopefully the start to a great new friendship.
2. My upper endoscopy went on without a hitch!  I did not wake up - I got a great nap and even dreamed.  I can't remember what about for the life of me - but I do remember I was enjoying it.
3. The anesthesiologist at the endoscopy center was a huge blessing to my life today.  Very kind and compassionate and took a moment to pray over me.  He even came back around after the endoscopy to see me and let me know that he would be thinking of me and praying for me and was sure I would do just fine with all that is ahead of me.  The kindness of strangers has been huge in my life today.
4. My surgery is scheduled.  It is not as quickly as I would like it to be - but it is scheduled.  And now I can get on with making plans for that time, etc...
5. And while I have been on the war path regarding scheduling my surgery - I have to say - I love my doctors.  They have taken time out of their very busy days to make personal phone calls to me and my husband and have helped to re-assure us and console us.  Not many doctors really care that much.  Mine do.  I am blessed.

Explanations

So I think we have some explanations for why the surgery is not as soon as we would like it to be.  My darling husband made some phone calls today and threw a few hissy fits with a few people (I have trained him well).

First he called Dr. Jalkut's office and talked to the scheduler.  He was nice about it, but he voiced his concern about telling me I basically have cancer, but then pushing surgery out 3 weeks.  The scheduler understood his frustration and offered to pass a message along to Dr. Jalkut. 

Dr. Jalkut himself called Daren back.  He was very understanding of our frustration and explained that the reason he could not do it until June 15 is because he really wanted a particular partner in his office to be in the surgery with him.  He is concerned about my previous surgeries - particulary my gastric bypass - and the challenge that will present to him to remove my kidney.  He really wants another surgeon in the OR with him to assist him with the unique challenges that may present.  With that being said - coordinating his schedule with his partner and the OR - this was the quickest they could get that scheduled.  He even recheduled all of his clinic appointments for that day so that he could do this surgery.  He could get me in sooner, but would only have a PA to assist him in the OR - and he very much wanted his partner in there.

So really - how can I be upset with that??? 

Hubby also called Dr. Bloom to "chat".  :)  Dr. Bloom and Dr. Jalkut talked and then Dr. Bloom called us.  We go the same story.  We also got reassurances from both doctors that this tumor has probably been there a long time and while they realize it's hard to wait and upsetting - it won't change much in that time and neither will the prognosis.

So I guess it is what it is.  I've never been very good at patience.  It appears I need another lesson in it or something.  Whatfrekinever.

So my bone scan is in the morning tomorrow.  Really wishing I had a kindle right about now to help me pass the time while I wait around.  :)  May have to smuggle my mom's MiFi gadget so I can at least surf the web while I wait.  Maybe I'll catch some of you on FB tomorrow!  :)

Surgery is scheduled

So Dr. Jalkut's office called right after my EGD this morning with my surgery date and details.  June 15.

Yes - that is pretty far out.

No - I'm not happy about it.

She asked if that date worked for me.  I said "Well, I was really hoping it would be sooner and was led to believe it would be."  She said this was the first available and Dr. Jalkut reserved it specifically for me because they had a cancellation that day - so he put my name in there himself.

It looks like hurry up and wait is the name of the game.

I have pre-op appointment with Dr. Jalkut and at the hospital on June 10.

Mmmmmmmmmm Propofol

So Propofol is my new best friend!

I had my upper endoscopy this morning.  Apparently they now use propofol when they do the EGD.  So less chance of you waking up or of them needing to wake you up.  And I dreamed!  I have no idea about what - but I know I dreamed and it was pretty cool.  And then I woke up and I felt fine.  I wasn't hung over and after about 30 minutes I wasn't even that tired.

It went well.  Dr. Hutzenbuhler didn't find anything she was concerned about.  She took some biopsies, but expects them to be fine.  I even got some really cool pictures!  Yeah!  (I think that is the propofol talking.)

As they were prepping me for the procedure you have to answer all those medical questions.  That always takes forever for me.  Yes I have had previous surgeries ... ready?  No really ... ready?  And we list those.  Any family history of ...?  Yup - ready?  And today we had to add the whole discussion of  "Oh, yeah, and by the way - I have a renal mass that I'm waiting to have removed."  UGH.

And, of course, I had to have this conversation with several people.  First the nurse, then the anesthetist.  The anesthetist asked me about the note about the renal mass.  I gave him the run down.  He was very nice and re-assuring that renal cell carcinoma (if it hasn't spread) is very treatable.  Then he grabbed my hand in his and closed his eyes and said a silent prayer for me for just a few seconds.  I smiled and said thank you.  He left my curtained area.  And then ... for the first time since I was told about Elvira ... I cried.

The Wrath of Pam

I'm so frustrated.  They still have not scheduled my surgery.  I called twice yesterday and this morning my husband called.  Today we got two excuses: one was that Dr. Jalkut has my file and has to write something up for the surgery before they can schedule it, and the other is that he wants to see the bone scan before he schedules the surgery.

Whatever - both of these contradict what he told me in person on Monday.  He said if he could do it on Tuesday - he would.  He said that surgery would be scheduled quickly.  Two days later is not quickly in my book.

And thus ... The Wrath of Pam.

So I called Dr. Bloom and told on him!  :)  So now Dr. Bloom and his nurse have both called over there to inquire about when I will be scheduled as well.

If I don't hear from them in the morning tomorrow - all hell will be breaking loose. 

Well, kinda.  I have my upper endoscopy tomorrow morning.  I have to be at the endoscopy center at 8:00am.  So I will probably be quite out of it tomorrow morning and well into the afternoon.  HHHHMMMMM .... The Wrath of Pam on versed ... this could be interesting.

But I am going to be persistent ... cause that's how I roll.  You've basically told me I have cancer.  You know when the bone scan is - and you know that you will have the results the same day - so put me on the freakin' OR schedule!  The trick is how do I do this with some level of decorum - seeing as how they do hold my kidney (damaged as it is) in their hands.

And speaking of the upper endoscopy.  I would rather have my kidney out than have another upper endoscopy.  Why?  Because the last time I had one they had to wake me up in the middle of it.  So instead of not remembering the procedure - I have very vivid memories of it - not fun to be awake while they stick a camera down your throat and into your stomach.  Hopefully, because I have lost so much weight and because I have a different doctor, this time will be a much better experience.

So I wish I had a better update to give you - this is today's update.  Watch out - Pam is on the warpath until she gets this surgery scheduled.

Bone Scan

OK - so I have my bone scan scheduled for Friday morning.  My understanding is this scan can take several hours - a lot of that waiting around time involved in that.  So there goes my Friday.

So, obviously, not going to have surgery this week.  Still waiting for that to be scheduled.  Apparently, Dr. Jalkut needs to write something up for the surgery before he gives it to the scheduler.  He has my file in his office and is working on it is what I'm being told.

So I still have an upper endoscopy scheduled for Thursday morning.  We are keeping that appointment because I am still having pretty persistent chest pain and we want to get to the bottom of it.  I'm beginning to believe it really could be stress or anxiety ... so bring on the Xanax baby!  :)  To be honest, I would rather have my kidney out than have an upper endsocopy.  The last time I had one they had to wake me up in the middle of it because I was gagging too much and they couldn't get the camera down far enough - so they had to wake me up with the camera half way down and get me to calm down (yeah right!) and breath through my nose so that they could progress the camera.  Most people don't remember their EGD's - I remember almost my entire EGD with vivid memory.  Not fun.  But I do hope to get some answers to this chest pain.

Since I will not have had my surgery by this weekend - I'm thinking I should really send Elvira off with a bang!  Ride this kidney hard while I have it!  :)  We'll see what I can conjur up!

Birthday Blessings

In the midst of all this ....  well it's not appropriate for me to use the words I am really thinking at the moment to describe what all "this" is ... but in the midst of all of it - here are my blessings.

1. Have I mentioned the great team of doctors I have?  Dr. Bloom, Dr. Jalkut, and Dr. Hutzenbuhler.  I think I hit the jackpot here.
2. Have I mentioned that I have some really kick ass friends?  RAMP in particular - you know who you are.  As Rebecca has said - I need RAMP time like I need air.  But it's not just RAMP - I have some great friends who lift me up in prayer, lift me up with encouragement, just lift me up in general.  Some old - some new.
3. My family - I am fortunate enough to have my parents living in my yard. Their support and encouragement is tremendous.  Then there's my sweet husband.  It's all OK.  We'll get through this together.  And my children - who keep me grounded and humble above all else.
4. I have been told by each one of my doctors to be thankful for the chest pain I have been having.  So as annoying as it is - I am thankful for it.  It led them to discover Elvira and she had been very quietly just waiting in the wings for her chance to shine.  I would still like to find out the source of the chest pain - cause it's still there.  Listening more to the theory that it's anxiety than I had before.  It may be that my body is anxious and my head has not caught up yet.  :)
5. Facebook.  Yes, I'm addicted.  But I'm also thankful for it - for a way to reach out to those in my life - past and present.  And also a way for them to reach out to me.  The words of encouragement that I have received the past few days have been like a salve to my soul.

So I am focusing on my blessings today.  Happy Birthday to me.

Accepting Help

A lot of people have been asking how they can help.  I am so bad at this question.  I hate asking for help and I just don't know how to answer when people ask how they can help.  I know that people want to help and I know that I probably could use help - and I'm just bad at this - just so plain bad.

So I have a couple of names of people you can contact if you do want to help out in any way.  You can contact my mom, Pat Dempsey (click on her name for her email), or Marsha Daniel (click on her name for the email).  They are also on Facebook and you can contact them through there as well.  I have a feeling these wonderful women will be more knowledgeable about what my needs are than even I will.

So I apologize if you have asked how you can help and I've blown you off. I just don't do this well.

The New 90/10 Rule

OK - so Dr. Jalkut is one of my new favorite doctors.  :)  Let's see if I can recap my appointment with him this afternoon.

• 90% chance that this is kidney cancer - WHOA!
• I will be having surgery soon - haven't gotten it scheduled yet.  He said if he could do it tomorrow he would.  Kinda glad it's not tomorrow - that's my birthday.  But it will probably be later this week or next week.
• He will remove my entire kidney. 
• He will not biopsy the mass as he has seen where during a biopsy they actually spread the cancer from the tumor and the person died of kidney cancer.  So no biopsy - just be done with the kidney since my left kidney looks very healthy.
• Need 2 things before surgery - a pulmonary CT Scan (which I just had done in the ER a few weeks ago - so they will just get that one) and a bone scan to see if the cancer has metastisized to either the lungs or the bone.
• Will try to do the surgery laproscopically, but with my history of many abdominal surgeries - that may not be possible.  If the surgery is laproscopic - 2-3 days in the hospital with 2-3 week recovery.  If it's open - 5-7 days in the hospital with 6-8 week recovery.

I think that's it.  Just waiting for the office to call with the appointment for the bone scan, surgery, and my pre-op appointment with Dr. Jalkut.